Self Care In The Time of Covid-19

Since the pandemic began, I’ve seen a sweet looking red head break down by the vegetable aisle at the supermarket. I’ve seen a mother steal a bag of avocados for her hungry children at the fruit market. I’ve seen an older man hold up the line for fifteen minutes talking to the clerk, because this is his only human connection for the day.  This list just includes market related incidents.

 

It is really hard to feel stable, when the world clearly isn’t right now. Covid-19 has exponentially increased the natural hardships of life for many of us. People are feeling more alone, less financially and emotionally stable and many of us feel that we have less purpose and meaning in our lives.  These circumstances have led many of us to become isolated from our families, unable to meet new potential partners and numerous folks have been stuck at home alone, or with a random roommate that they met on craigslist.

 

There is no “right” way to engage in self care because we are all different with unique experiences and ways of existing in the world. Here are some ways to engage in self care during this weird AF time.  

 

 

Be extra kind to yourself.

 When I’m going through a stressful time I always gain weight and break out. I then find myself experiencing even more tension because I’m stressed for the initial reason but also stressed because I don’t feel good in my body.  I have been working on noticing when I’m being mean to myself and trying to refute my negative thoughts and be kinder.  Force yourself to look in the mirror and point out five parts of my body that I like.  Try to be appreciative to yourself for doing the best you can, instead of beating yourself for what you could be doing better.

 

 

Find new ways to connect.  

At the begining of the pandemic I was like, fuck it, I’m akward on the phone lets just wait this out and I’ll see people in the flesh soon. Fast-forward nine months later… I’m doing zoom coffee and finally feeling comfortable on the phone! Of course, in person is better, but connecting on the interwebs is much better than not connecting at all. I actually had the pleasure of catching up with a couple friends that I haven’t talked to in years because we had the time!  Think about if there is someone you would enjoy talking to and set up an internet date.  You don’t even have to wear pants!

 

 

Work on a project.

Any project. It increases well being to have something to work on and improve upon everyday. Perhaps you are a plant mama or papa.  Perhaps you start  a podcast or blog.  Maybe you finally are actually going to write in a journal everyday or do some apartment renovations.  Perhaps it’s time to learn now to cook.  For me it was designing a bunch of clitoris themes mugs to sell on the internet.  There is no right way to do this, but waking up and feeling like you have a thing to work on, is a great step towards meaning!

 

 

Go outside!

 I know it’s cold and there isn’t much going on out there, but leaving the house everyday is really good for you. Even if it’s just to sit on your porch or walk around the block, taking in the world is so important. If you are far enough away from people that you don’t have to wear a mask, smile at them. The energy of another's presence can be really uplifting at this time.  Especially during days where you might not have many connections.

 





You don’t need a partner to sexually expand.

 I feel like I have figured out a way to include masturbation in all of my articles, so here it is.  Now is a great time to play around with new sensations and pleasure.  I suggest breaking your masturbation pattern and enjoying all this extra free time you have been given to explore your body in new and exciting ways. Google WTF a cervical orgasm is.  Explore what putting a finger in your butt feels like while you touch yourself.  If you are able, buy yourself a fun new toy and explore.  

 

 

Next winter won’t feel like this one. I believe we are in the beginning of the final stretch. I know the coming months will be very difficult for many of us, as there are even less ways to socialize than when we could go outside without freezing our tits off.  Do what you can to remember how amazing you are and be kind to yourself during this hard time. Cheers to a better 2021. 





Niki D

Niki is a full time sexuality educator, writer and private sex coach. The focus of her Masters in psychology was sexuality and she has lectured at NYU, The United Nations and many other venues on the subjects of sexual communication, sexual assault intervention and support, and human sexuality. Follow her @nikidavisf

https://www.instagram.com/nikidavisf/
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